Archive for August, 2012

it could be worse, I guess

August 24, 2012

I’ve been sick for most of the last two weeks and then I woke up with a really sore neck.  It’s a sad thing when your body just throws in the towel like that.

Sorry about the long bit of silence on my part.  I had miserable allergies and then was on a long vacation without the internet – it was a bad case of in-law-itis.  And then I got a bad cold.  Super bad – so congested and sore muscles.  I still crawled into work for half days to finish up what I needed to do, but it was a miserable time.  Too miserable to write, too miserable to return comments, too miserable to deal with my bad work situation.

The work situation was resolved, but not in my favor.  It’s almost like a dare now.  (W would not categorize it like that – he just knows and my boss and I know how underemployed and under paid I was, and now I’m less underemployed but no less under paid.)  But in my head, it’s a dare.  Like if I could finish up a original novel, even a sucky internet self-published thing, I bet I could make about what I make at my job.  Or else I have to get them to start paying for more training so I can leave that job, but I need to make it sound like I’m getting that training to become more valuable to them.

Anyway, it was and still has the bits of bad situation around here.  Once I really start feeling better, maybe that will clear up.  Everything tends to look worse when I’m feeling physically under the weather.

I was so sick I used a neti pot.  (It’s something where you pour water through one nostril and get it to come out the other.  It sounds terrible, and if you’re congested, it’s even worse, but when the other meds aren’t doing their job, anything, even pouring water through your face sounds like a viable alternative.)  Verdict: gross.  And I was so congested that one side didn’t even let any water out – just pooled in my face.  Gross.  Still, stopping felt pretty good.

I suppose I should be glad that illness and in-laws and bad work situation and just not having any energy just puts me into a flat emotional non-writing state with flare-ups of annoyance and not a real depression.